In all the excitement from my sister getting her doctorate yesterday I forgot to mention that yesterday I saw my first Irish rat…fucking around my flowerpots outside in broad daylight. It went like this:
M: BATTLE! Come here! Look! What is THAT?!
B: It’s a rat.
M: No it’s not. It’s gotta be like a weasel or something. Or a stoat.
B: No, look at the tail - it’s a rat.
M: That is not a rat. I used to have a rat. She lived in our warm house and she got to eat all the food she could and she never had to struggle for her existence, and she was like a third the size of that thing.
B: I told you not to put out breadcrumbs for the birds.